The first one comes right after Christmas, on December 26, is an afternoon wedding with an early evening/cocktails reception at a fine hotel.
The second comes two days after, on the 28th. A little less formal, though on a slightly larger scale. Reception is, uh, still unbelievable therefore shall remain unconfirmed.
The third and the last comes nearly three weeks after, on January 17, providing one ample time to prepare as it is the most important wedding of the three. It will be a garden wedding with relatives painfully scrutinizing one's, uh, singlehoodedness (singledom?). In addition, there will be overwhelming pressure to participate in the bouquet (and garter) toss as yours truly is the still-shamefully-single-younger-sister of the groom. Expect heavy teasing and 20 million questions as regards your personality, family background, medical history, mental capacity and resume. One is also expected to stay til end of the reception.
REQUIREMENTS:
- a decent suit -- or at the very least, dress pants and long-sleeved dress shirt, and gleaming dress shoes; that all three should match is a given
- a clean face and all-around physique -- though an Adonis-type is not required, it is a definite advantage
- a list of acceptable topics to fill in awkward moments of silence (ex. weather, food, movies, etc.)
- an attention span of at least 90 seconds; less than that, would unfortunately be rejected immediately
- a response time of not more than ten seconds, or else I should be doubtful as to one's mental health
- a repertoire of basic dance steps for the subsequent reception
COMPENSATION PACKAGE:
- free food and entertainment immediately succeeding the wedding ceremonies
- transportation to the wedding location and reception shall be provided for
- guarantee of pleasant, if not downright, handsome partnership of yours truly
- inclusion in photo and video package of the wedding couple
- possibility for post-wedding affiliation, of friendly or romantic nature, as depends on degree of attraction and mutual consent
