Upchuck The New "Chuck"

One fine day sometime in the year of our Lord, 2008, I grasped my ole Faithful remote in my hand and switched on Lady TV. There, I first laid eyes and ears to Chuck. And I was hooked.

Taking from someone else's page, Zachary Levi starred as computer geek and social misfit Chuck Bartowski in this heady NBC combination of comedy, fantasy, espionage, teen angst and wish fulfillment. While working a technical-support firm called the Nerd Herd, Chuck accidentally downloaded millions of megabytes of government secrets into his own brain! This made him an invaluable commodity to his former college roommate Bryce Larkin (Matthew Bomer), whom Chuck had always assumed was an accountant but was actually a CIA agent.... Read more Recruiting Chuck as a human "secret weapon", Bryce was also saddled with the responsibility of keeping our hero alive--or at least, out of the hands of the Enemy. Lightening Chuck's burden considerably was his sexy contact person Sarah Walker (Yvonne Strahovski), who somehow managed to shed most of her clothes in each episode. Also in the cast were Adam Baldwin as irascible CIA boss Maj. John Casey, Joshua Gomez as Chuck's goofy best friend Morgan Grimes, Sarah Lancaster as Chuck's troublesome sister Ellie, and, at Nerd Herd headquarters, Mark Christopher Lawrence as manager Big Mike, C.S. Lee as assistant manager C.S. Lee, and Chuck's coworkers Anna (Julia Ling), Lester (Vik Sahay) and Jeff (Scott Krinsky). And it all may seem too much, too confusing, but really all the details fall together perfectly like one crazy bag of nuts. I followed the show religiously for its entire first season and quite truthfully was absolutely pinching and squinching for the second season.

I was patient. Chuck was hot, and I knew it would take some time before it reached the subterrains of our broadcast systems. And so when I caught the last 3 seconds of its second season premiere, I just about jumped out of my skin in outrage at the total lack of warning. The complete absence of notice of its airing. I didn't even get to take note of its time slot I was so incensed!

I groped around the TV Land looking for another glimpse of the show, until it finally dawned on me to ask my equally TV-dependent brother if he knew anything of Chuck's new season. Armed with his barely reliable man-data of Chuck's new time slot, I finally tuned in to my first dose of second season computer-spy-geek-action two weeks later.

Aaaand, my oh my. Money does change everything. Apparently, even computer-spy-geeks normally known to staunchly never sell out in spite of the overabundance of vanity in modern society.

What was so great about the first season was that Chuck was such a breath of fresh air from the cliche lineup of overdramatized forensic shows, promiscuity-flavored medical shows, soft-porn-masquerading-as-teen-shows, and tabloidish reality shows. It was quick and sharp. Plotlines were simple and easy to follow even if they lay them one on top of the other, and best of all, the cast was GENUINE! Who wouldn't believe that Zachary Levi, Joshua Gomez, Julia Ling, Vik Sahay, and Scott Krinsky were really the geeks of Buy More's Nerd Herd? That Adam Baldwin and Yvonne Strahovski were spies? They looked, breathed, and lived it! At least til before the second season aired.

One episode. All it took was one episode and I knew, I wouldn't be watching this show anymore. Gaaaad. Everybody was wearing HAIR PRODUCT! And the geeks were dolled up in MAKE-UP! Joshua Gomez now sports a mohawk and Vik Sahay looks like a girl, for heaven's sake. How completely insulting. Even Chuck, tsk tsk. What, have I missed celebrity Beauty and the Geek featuring the cast of Chuck?!?

And the problems go down to the core. Lines were cliche and the plot so damn OBVIOUS! Gaaaad. If this was what I asked for, I would've watched CSI: Miami instead. But this is Chuck man!

How could you, Josh Schwartz? You should be ashamed of yourself.

And I had such high hopes for you when you finally decided to kill off Mischa Barton in the O.C. I mean, something had to finally work, right? She's been drugged, drunked, raped...whodathunk a simple car accident would finally do the trick? Are you trying to do the same for Chuck Bartowski?

Have some mercy, man! It's only his second season and the show's got a bit more life left in its loins. Lay off the cosmetics and lay off your lousy writers! You just wasted the total star power of Jordana Brewster and the cult attraction of a lovable spy geek in Zachary Levi.

Sigh.

I guess I should've known. The moment I found out that Josh Schwartz, creator of the show O.C., came up with this completely fresh and witty new action-comedy Chuck, I felt it was too good to be true. Looks like he's proven me right.

Ass! I am NOT happy.